{"id":20811,"date":"2013-03-22T04:00:30","date_gmt":"2013-03-22T09:00:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/michaelhyatt.com\/?p=20811"},"modified":"2013-03-22T04:00:30","modified_gmt":"2013-03-22T09:00:30","slug":"tale-of-two-coaches","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fullfocus.co\/tale-of-two-coaches\/","title":{"rendered":"A Tale of Two Coaches: What Kind Are You?"},"content":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s more to coaching<\/a> than sharing your expertise. The way<\/em> you communicate that expertise is as important as the knowledge itself.
\n
\nYears ago I went golfing with my friend and colleague, Dr. Victor Oliver. I had played quite a bit as a teenager, but had set aside my clubs when I became an adult. At the age of forty-three I decided to take it up again.
\n
\nI bought a new set of clubs, reviewed the rules, and even read a couple of golfing books. However, I was still lacking the one thing you must have to succeed at the game of golf: confidence.<\/p>\n

I sliced my first drive, red-faced as the ball bounced into the tall grass and disappeared. Unfazed, Victor declared. \u201cYou have a great swing, Mike. You\u2019re a natural. You\u2019ll get the hang of this in no time.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rather than dwelling on my failed attempt, Victor\u2019s assurance immediately turned my mind to the next shot. I couldn\u2019t wait to take another swing.<\/p>\n

After a few more shots, I was within striking distance of the green. As I approached the ball and began to setup for the shot, Victor gently interrupted me.<\/p>\n

\u201cFor these kinds of shots, I always imagine I am sitting on the edge of a bar stool. I lean forward with my back straight and head down. Then I just take a nice, full swing \u2026 like this.\u201d<\/p>\n

“Got it,\u201d I nodded. I then mimicked his stance, took a slow, steady swing, and put the ball right on the green, eight feet from the pin.<\/p>\n

“Beautiful, Mike. I told you you were a natural.\u201d<\/p>\n

Over the next several years, I played golf with Victor numerous times. I always played my best when I was with him at my side. His gentle, reassuring voice gave me the one thing books, expensive clubs, and even lessons couldn\u2019t: confidence.<\/p>\n

I also occasionally played golf with another friend. I\u2019ll call him Frank (not his real name). He was a good deal older than I, but a great golfer\u2014even better than Victor. But the two were complete opposites when it came to coaching.<\/p>\n

I still remember the last time I played with him. On hole number three, I sliced a drive into the deep rough. Certain it was unplayable, I dropped my club to the ground, and sighed.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that was a helluva<\/em> shot,\u201d Frank grumbled. \u201cYou didn\u2019t finish your swing. You just kinda \u2026 kinda gave up on it.\u201d He then frowned and snorted.<\/p>\n

With that, he stepped up to the tee box and pinned his tee and ball to the ground in one seamless motion. Then, without so much as a practice swing, he blasted his ball straight down the middle of the fairway.<\/p>\n

It was picture-perfect. Just like on TV. Speaking to no one in particular, he announced, \u201cThat\u2019s<\/em> how it\u2019s done!\u201d<\/p>\n

He stood tall.<\/p>\n

I felt small.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, this scenario was typical. Frank was always quick to point out my faults. If I happened to hit the ball well, he would say something like, \u201cWell, you got lucky on that one, didn\u2019t ya, kid?\u201d<\/p>\n

Not surprisingly, I always played my worst golf when I played with Frank. He chipped away at my confidence, and my performance unraveled as the game progressed. He made me want to quit.<\/p>\n

In reflecting on these two different coaching styles<\/a>, I realized I have a choice in how I lead.<\/p>\n

I can either focus on what my teammates are doing right and thus increase their confidence, or I can focus on what they are doing wrong and thus increase their self-doubt. Both styles have an impact on their performance. And both have an impact on my effectiveness as a leader.<\/p>\n

What style do you use in coaching those you lead?<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s more to coaching than sharing your expertise. The way you communicate that expertise is as important as the knowledge itself. Years ago I went golfing with my friend and colleague, Dr. Victor Oliver. I had played quite a bit as a teenager, but had set aside my clubs when I became an adult. At […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":20846,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34],"tags":[1159,1160,160,228,1161,33,1162],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nA Tale of Two Coaches: What Kind Are You?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There\u2019s more to coaching than sharing your expertise. 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