Your boss suddenly resigns. You think his boss should tap you for the job, but that doesn\u2019t happen right away. He calls you into his office and says that you\u2019d be a suitable candidate, but he wants to think it over and consider his options, maybe bring someone in from outside with more experience.
\n
\nThis puts you in an awkward position, because you want the job but you also want the pay raise that comes with the job. And you wouldn\u2019t mind holding onto your current job if the promotion doesn\u2019t come through. What do you say?
\nMany moons ago, I found myself in exactly this pickle. You might be surprised how I got out of it.
\n<\/p>\n
Before I tell you what I did in this case, let me tell you a negotiating secret I gleaned decades ago from author James Dobson: \u201cHe who needs the other person the least is in control of the relationship.\u201d
\nThis was, quite frankly, the best piece of negotiating advice I\u2019d ever received, and I\u2019ve put it to use in countless situations.
\nI\u2019ve used it to buy things, including cars and real estate. I\u2019ve used it to negotiate on the job or when coming into new jobs. It even works in parenting, when necessary.
\nThe trick is to really put yourself in the position where you don\u2019t need the other person as badly as they need you. How do you do that? Three suggestions:<\/p>\n
Never fall in love with something you are trying to acquire\u2014at least not at first. Be a little aloof. Don\u2019t get emotionally attached. Kick the tires. (This point was underscored for me by Robert G. Allen, author of numerous financial books.)<\/p>\n
In negotiations, the first person to name a number usually loses. So let the other person go first and pace your responses to theirs. If they take 24 hours to respond, set your clock for tomorrow at this time.<\/p>\n
This is important. The more options you have, the more you will believe you don\u2019t need any particular offer. For example, want to sell a car at the best price? Get multiple offers for it. It will change your negotiating posture and put you in a position of strength.
\n\t\t